Hairy Heartburn

B texted last night to say, "Oh man, I think this little one is going to have a head full of hair because the crazy heartburn has started already!"  This made me laugh, and of course feel excited for a head full of hair...but bad that she's having heartburn and we're not even halfway there yet.  She said that all four of her kids came out with a ton of hair, and she got the same heartburn with each one of them.  (Am wondering if this is a wive's tale?)

Either way, I was one of those babies that didn't have hair for ages, so it would be awesome to have a baby with hair.  All the better for sooner being able to braid, spike, curling iron (j/k).  Can you tell that today I'm secretly hoping for a girl?  I can assure you that tomorrow I'll be hoping for a boy.  That's how it goes around these parts.  But no matter which one it is, I'm not-so-secretly hoping for a redhaired kid.  N's mom and brother have red hair, and our egg donor has blonde hair....so there's a chance that it could turn out.  Haha!   Oh the things that fill our minds while we're waiting on babies to arrive.

In the meantime, I'm still on the road to inducing lactation.  Nothing much to tell really.  I haven't started pumping yet.  Probably going to start this weekend.  (I went off the meds last weekend by accident b/c I went out of town and forgot my pills in another bag.  GAh!)

 

Sisters of a Tribe 2.0

This past weekend I went to a conference in Oklahoma for women affected by AIS and other DSDs.  It was a life changing experience for me to meet so many other women experiencing the same condition as me (or something similar to it).   I'm having trouble even putting down the words to describe what it was like meeting so many other beautiful and courageous women that just "get it" b/c they've been there too.  It definitely made me proud that I created this blog to share the truth about my story and our surrogacy journey.

Anyways...not much else to say on this topic b/c my heart is just too full.  

17 week update

Today B went to the doctor and he said everything looked great.  The baby's heartbeat was 141 bpm.  Apparently the doctor was having trouble counting the heartbeat b/c our little stinker was moving around so much he kept losing it!  I guess we got ourselves a live wire in there!  Meanwhile, both the doctor and B have "a feeling" that the baby is a girl.  We'll see soon enough!!

16 wk 1 day belly shot! (Plus update)

B sent us a pic of her belly today!!  So cute!! She's got the smallest little baby bump!  It feels more real for sure now!  And of course, now that I've had one...I'm definitely going to want more.  LOL.  I'll see if I can get her to send us one a week.  

As for me and the lactation, things are fine I suppose.  The breasts don't seem to have gotten any larger and don't feel "full" or any different really.  After next week I'm going to start pumping earlier than what the protocol says to do, but it seemed to work well for Tonya...so we'll see.

Not much else to tell really.  I'm meeting another woman in person this weekend who is doing the whole adoptive breastfeeding as well.  Her adoptive baby is being born in Sept so she's on an accelerated protocol.  It will be interesting to compare notes with her.

Alright...it's late.  Heading to bed.  I can't stop looking at our pic though!   :-)

Inducing Lactation: Day 8, plus quick update

Today is the first day of increasing my dosage of domperidone.  It doubles today, and so far everything has gone pretty well I suppose.  This past week I had minor headaches at night, in particular.  I'm not entirely sure that it's due to the domperidone, though I suspect it is.  I'm hoping it's just due to seasonal allergies.  If it is the domperidone, then I suspect it's b/c I'm not drinking enough water.  So as I head into this second week of meds, I'm definitely going to increase my water consumption.  I'm trying to limit my caffeine intake as well.  One and a half cups of coffee a day.  I should probably have even less than that, but talk about causing a headache without it!!  OMG.  The headaches have started around 10pm and last through the night.  I usually wake up during the night and drink some water by my bed, and fall back asleep.  Then once I wake up (in the morning), have some coffee and more water the headache goes away.  The rest of the day, I'm fine.  Has anyone else inducing lactation had this problem?  Especially frustrating since I'm only a WEEK into the medications.   :-\

In terms of any visible breast change, there hasn't been a ton in just a week.  Although I've  noticed they've gotten a bit larger, they mostly feel different.  Fuller. Bouncier.  My husband is definitely liking the change!!  Haha!  (We'll see how things progress as I get further into this process.)

Not much else to tell really.  We're playing the famous surrogacy "Waiting Game" over here.  I feel like everything I do these days involves waiting.  B says the baby is growing well and doing fine.  Nothing major to report.  We touch base about once a week.  (Again with the waiting. These are the moments when I wish she and I were closer, both physically and personally.  But at the end of the day, we both have our reservations about getting too close I think.  So in the meantime, I just wait and try to fill up my time reading blogs and focus on getting my meds correct.)  Waiting is one of the hardest parts of this process, especially for an impatient Taurus like myself.

Oh, and for anyone else going through the surrogacy journey, have you recently tallied up how much $$ you've spent on the process so far?  Did it make your stomach jump up in your throat!?

Ohmigod!

Although I know we've spent less than many b/c our first attempt was successful (which I'm eternally grateful for), I will say that wow...all those meds, fees, lawyers, ivf, gifts, flights, bed rest, cards, hotels, etc add up quickly!  We're now almost at the $$ amount where I hoped we'd be at the END....and we still have 5 months to go!  Thankfully a lot of it is advance money paid out in escrow, but still.  Once again, I have to salute everyone going through this process b/c it's draining both mentally...and financially.

But even with the humdrum waiting and gasp-inducing financial revelations, I haven't lost sight (or excitement for) the end result!!  I'm so excited about meeting our little bean for the first time, that I can't stand it.  At the end of this road, all the hard stuff will be worth it!  Even our one little fur kid that is a complete terror must be getting excited because on this morning's walk, he didn't freak out at all when a little girl on a scooter rode by him with about 6" to spare.  That is a miracle indeed!

Inducing Lactation: Day 3

Just to recap, I am planning on inducing lactation for our baby that is now due in 175 days!!  (We're 15 weeks today!  Whoppppeeee!)  I'm using the Newman-Goldfarb method to induce lactation with the "Regular Protocol for Mothers over 35" also called the "Menopause Protocol."   (Though you can understand why my vanity might not allow me to refer to it that way.  Haha.) Also, to recap, I'm on HRT (hormone replacement therapy) so that factors into things a bit here as well.

First step.  Talk to my doctor.  I FINALLY got him on the phone about this b/c I didn't want to drive all the way to South Jersey for an appt.  He only knew a bit about this process, and suggested I look up the "Lenore Goldfarb method."  I laughed and told him that I already had, which is why I was calling to talk to him.  He was fine with all of the protocols, so I went on to the...

Second step.  I stopped my HRT.  Basically the estrogen in my HRT reduces the amount of milk that will be produced.  A friend successfully breastfed using this method, but kept with her HRT during the time of breastfeeding.  She said it severely limited her milk production, so she (and Lenore) recommended that I stop it during this time.  (Side note, I'm taking a Calcium supplement to help replace the calcium my bones may lose during this time.  For some reason I have always had a brain blockage against taking vitamins.  Probably b/c I already feel I have to take one everyday.)

Third step.  Start the Provera and Domperidone combination.  (Provera 2.5mg per day + 10mg domperidone 4 x per day.)  Seeing as how this is Day 3, not much has really happened yet.  I have noticed a bit of dry mouth from the domperidone, but I'm trying to drink more water...which is something Lenore suggested anyways.  Next week I'll be increasing the domperidone dose to 20mg 4 x per day.  Will need even more water. 

I bought my Domperidone (Motilium) and Provera from a pharmacy online based in New Zealand called inhousepharmacy.biz.  Domperidone isn't common in the U.S. and is only available at certain compounding pharmacies, plus my insurance is kind of sucky sometimes about prescriptions...so I went with this option.  The meds came really quick and look perfect.  Here's a pic of what you can expect from them if you order the same meds.  (Note this pic was taken once I'd already opened them and started taking my meds. It didn't come with opened containers!)  

So yeah...not much to tell at the moment other than joking about how I'm finally going to be a Double D.  Haha.   

As a plus, my friend let me have her breast pump (and a Moby Wrap too)!  I'll be keeping everyone updated on the progress, especially since it seems to make people weirded out when I've said anything about breastfeeding the baby.    

And again...for anyone looking how to induce lactation, here's the protocol I'm using.  

Top 4 things you should never say to an Intended Parent, especially not an Intended Mom

1. "Have you talked to the mother lately?"  - I AM THE MOTHER!!! YOU ARE CURRENTLY SPEAKING WITH HER!  If you are referring to our surrogate, yes, I've spoken to her and she is doing fine.  But to clarify, she's not the mother.  (This was said to me yesterday from my mother-in-law.  I wanted to punch her.)
2. "So how much are you spending to buy this baby?"  - Seriously!  Why would anyone say that?   And yet, that is what a friend asked me last night over dinner.  First, it's soooooo inappropriate to ask someone about their finances and money.  Second, describing this process as "buying a baby" made me want to punch him as well.  Ugh.  Our surrogate is helping us to conceive...we didn't go to the store to pick one off the shelf.  
3. "What's her salary?" - referring to our surrogate.  She's not a paid employee.  Again, it's rude to discuss anything of the sort.  And yes, because she's doing this out of the graciousness of her heart...we want to repay her as best we can.  Let's leave it at that.  
4. "Are you afraid she's going to keep the baby?"  - No, I'm not afraid of that.  She has 4 children of her own and also, that is what lawyers and contracts are for.  Besides, see #1...she's not the mother.   And even if I was...why would you say something like that and put that energy out there?  

*Sigh* Having a baby via surrogacy requires thick skin and a lot of fortitude.  Hats off to all the other intended moms and their surrogates out there!  (Meanwhile, this list isn't even speaking to the comments that B gets as well.  One of the recent ones was a simple, "You're pregnant....AGAIN!"  Hahah!!  She was at least able to retort, "Yes, but it's not my baby this time!"